Aspirations of the Mind

I am stuck. That is the most adequate way to describe it. Stuck. I am so held down this morning by the cares of life. I have been so incredibley lazy the last few weeks (that's another story in itself) and now the consequences of that are showing up. I am on spring break, but even so it's been so hard to focus and sit down and get anything done.

On a better note, last week I got accepted into Youth with a Mission or YWAM. I'll be spending three months of my summer in Los Angelos, California doing ministry at their base and learning and growing and OH MY I CAN"T WAIT! This is a dream come true.

But even this has worries. I really need to buy my plane ticket soon and don't have the money. That's part of why I'm so overcome with anxiety this morning. It's been plaguing me, how the heck am I going to come up with $345!?!

Seriously, these are the moments in life that I stuff God in this box and try and control Him. I forget that God could totally blow me over at any second. He is the One who makes it rain in spring and snow in winter. he holds the universe in His hands. That's nuttso! God is bigger than $345. I have to believe that is nothing to Him.

And I just feel crappy in general today. Maybe because the sun is out. Plus our house is a disaster! Whenever that happens I get irritated and frustrated with myself. Which of course is why I am going to spend this morning cleaning.